12/6/12

Little Ads Gift Ideas - Nude is the new "not nude".

More help from Yore in finding that perfect gift that leaves them speechless, or, at least silent... possibly for weeks to come. Silence your friends and family with these gifts! Time to gift up!

Call her "Venus" if you want, but any reasonable person would call it a "naked lady toothpick". Let all the fleshly naked ladies know that you have recently eaten. This will surely demonstrate your viability as a provider and sexual partner. Nothing reels in the naked ladies like naked lady shaped stuff!

This Newd Nick apron will have the cook laughing face down on the grill! It's made of partially flammable canvas covered with the hilarious antics of Newd Nick, the kooky character, the core of whose comedy is that he is naked! Also, he's drunk! Perfect for the naked drunk on your Christmas shopping list!

This Jayne Mansfield hot water bottle isn't naked, but Jayne Mansfield in a bikini is like a regular woman naked. Fill her with hot water and snuggle up. Your lonely nights spent snuggling nothing and feeling like a loser are over! Get cozy with a miniature vinyl Jayne! This gift is sure to please the lucky, chilly, horny, desperate man in your life! Let him know you care about his chilliness, horniness, and desperation just enough to buy him a hot water bottle.



3 comments:

Sue said...

I want one of each. Now, please make that time machine and take my order!

Anonymous said...

Ha! - I actually OWN one of the Mansfield bottles! Found it at a garage sale - paid $5 for it. Collectible. Thanks P.A.G.! Now I have the ad to go with it.

MisterFancyHotballs_2

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Sue, I suggest you start combing the garage sales. As for a garage sale comb, I don't kow where you'd find one of those.

MisterFancyHotballs_2, I hope you spend many an arctic night warmed by Jayne. Email if you want the super high res scan of the ad for your archives. Now the circle is complete.

[-Mgmt.]

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